Finding Balance: Self-Care for Parents of Children with Autism
Parenting a child with autism is a journey filled with unique joys, deep love, and, often, immense challenges. The days can be long, the routines demanding, and the emotional weight heavy.
In the midst of advocating, scheduling therapies, managing meltdowns, and celebrating progress, one essential piece often gets lost in the shuffle: you. Self-care isn’t selfish. It’s not optional. For parents of children with autism, it’s a lifeline.
Why Self-Care Matters
You are the foundation of your child’s world. When you’re running on empty, everything becomes harder — your patience wears thin, your mental clarity fades, and burnout creeps in. Prioritizing your well-being isn’t a luxury; it’s a way to ensure you can continue to show up as the strong, loving, and resourceful parent your child needs.
Recognizing the Signs of Burnout
Before we dive into self-care strategies, it’s essential to be aware of the signs that you might be reaching (or have already reached) burnout:
- Constant exhaustion –physical or emotional
- Feeling overwhelmed or helpless
- Irritability or short temper
- Trouble sleeping
- Withdrawing from others
- Neglecting your health
Simple, Realistic Self-Care Strategies
Self-care doesn’t need to be a day at the spa or a weekend getaway (though those are great if you can swing them). It’s about small, consistent habits that replenish you. Here are some ideas:
1. Create Micro-Moments of Peace
Even five minutes of deep breathing, stretching, or simply sitting with your eyes closed can reset your nervous system. Use car rides, bathroom breaks, or the time while waiting for therapy sessions to fit in mini moments of calm.
2. Stay Connected
Isolation is common among parents in the autism community. Reach out to friends, join a support group (online or local), or follow autism parenting forums where you can vent, learn, and feel understood.
3. Establish Boundaries
It’s okay to say no. You don’t have to attend every event, volunteer for every activity, or explain every detail of your parenting journey. Protect your energy.
4. Ask for (and Accept) Help
This one’s hard for many, but essential. Let others step in — whether it’s a grandparent offering to watch your child for an hour or a neighbor dropping off a meal. You’re not weak for needing support; you’re human.
5. Nurture Your Identity
You are more than a parent. Carve out time for what lights you up — reading, gardening, music, crafts, exercise. Reconnecting with what brings you joy fuels resilience.
6. Prioritize Sleep and Nutrition
It sounds basic, but getting decent rest and nourishing your body profoundly impacts how you cope. Set up nighttime routines that help you wind down, and aim for small, healthy meals to keep your energy stable.
More Comprehensive Self-Care Activities
If a parent has more time and financial resources, they can engage in more comprehensive self-care activities that allow for deeper rejuvenation, emotional healing, and mental clarity. Here are some detailed self-care activities for parents of children with autism, taking into account both time and budget flexibility:
1. Regular Therapy and Counseling Sessions
Therapy offers a safe space for parents to process their feelings, reduce stress, and develop coping mechanisms. It can be particularly beneficial for parents of children with autism who often face unique stresses, anxiety, and emotional fatigue.
2. Spa Retreat or Wellness Weekend
A retreat focused on relaxation, meditation, and physical rejuvenation can allow parents to disconnect from the stress of caregiving and experience a reset. This extended time away can also help alleviate some of the chronic physical tension that many parents carry.
3. Personal Fitness Trainer or Class Membership
Physical exercise has numerous benefits for mental health, including reducing anxiety, improving mood, and boosting overall energy levels. Regular exercise also helps release built-up tension and stress.
4. Creative Workshops or Art Therapy
Engaging in creative activities can be deeply therapeutic and provide an outlet for emotions that may be difficult to express verbally. It can also improve self-esteem, reduce stress, and stimulate positive feelings of accomplishment.
5. Travel and Exploration
Traveling offers the opportunity to reset, experience new environments, and return to daily life with fresh energy. Exploring new places can help you break free from routine, clear your mind, and reconnect with yourself.
A Gentle Reminder: You’re doing an incredible job. There is no such thing as a perfect parent — only a present one. Taking care of yourself isn’t abandoning your responsibilities; it’s making sure you can carry them well.
Litzy Vivas graduated from Texas State University in 2022 with her Bachelor of Science in Health Sciences. She is pursuing a Master of Science in Applied Behavior Analysis at Purdue University, working toward becoming a BCBA. Beginning her ABA journey in 2023 in San Antonio, she was later given the opportunity to support her community through BrightPath Behavior in 2024. She chose the field of ABA because she’s passionate about helping children reach their full potential. Litzy believes each child’s progress reflects the dedication and hard work of both the child and the family. She loves being a part of that support system and witnessing the life-changing impact of ABA therapy. A fun fact about her is that she has two cats, Frankie and Ivy.
