understanding stimming

Understanding Stimming: What It Means and How to Support

If you’ve ever seen someone repeatedly flap their hands, rock back and forth, or hum to themselves, you may have witnessed stimming. While these behaviors can seem unusual at first, they’re often a natural and essential part of life for many individuals with autism.

In this post, we’ll explore what stimming is, why it matters, and how we can support and understand those who use it.

understanding stimming

What is Stimming?

Stimming, short for “self-stimulatory behavior,” refers to repetitive movements, sounds, or actions. It can include things like:

  • Hand-flapping
  • Rocking back and forth
  • Spinning objects
  • Tapping fingers
  • Repeating words or phrases (echolalia)
  • Humming or making other vocal sounds

Who Stims?

Everyone engages in some form of stimming. Think about tapping your foot when nervous, twirling your hair while thinking, or biting your nails when anxious. For neurotypical individuals, these actions might go unnoticed. But for individuals with autism and others with neurodevelopmental conditions (such as ADHD or sensory processing disorder), stimming can be more frequent and noticeable, and deeply important.

Why Is Stimming Important?

For many neurodivergent people, stimming is a vital self-soothing tool. Suppressing it can lead to increased stress, meltdowns, or burnout. Trying to eliminate stimming—often referred to as “masking”—can be emotionally hurtful.

It’s crucial to recognize that stimming, unless it causes bodily harm, does not need to be “fixed.”

Why Do People with Autism Stim?

Stimming serves many purposes. It can help:

  • Sensory Regulation: People with sensory processing differences may under- or over-react to environmental stimuli (lights, sounds, textures). Stimming provides predictable sensory feedback, helping to balance their internal state.
  • Emotional Expression and Release: Frustration, anxiety, excitement, and joy can all be overwhelming. Stimming allows a physical outlet for these strong emotions when other forms of expression feel too challenging.
  • Communication: For individuals who struggle with verbal language, stims can signal their current state: for instance, flapping hands may express excitement, while rocking might indicate anxiety.
  • Self-soothing and Focus: Similar to how some people chew gum or tap a foot unconsciously, stimming can help maintain concentration, especially during tasks that feel unstimulating or overly demanding.

It’s essential to recognize that stimming is not a behavior to be “fixed.” Instead, it’s a form of coping, expression, and self-regulation.

When Is Stimming a Concern?

Stimming is generally harmless. However, there are cases where it might require intervention:

  • Self-injurious behaviors: Such as head-banging or biting, which can lead to injury.
  • Interference with learning or daily activities: When it prevents someone from engaging in essential tasks.

Even then, the goal isn’t to eliminate stimming but to understand the why behind it and offer safer or more appropriate alternatives.

How to Support Someone Who Stims

  • Don’t Judge or Shame. Avoid calling stimming “weird” or “wrong.” Respect it as part of someone’s way of existing in the world.
  • Ask Before Intervening. Unless the behavior is harmful, there’s usually no need to intervene. If you’re unsure whether a stim is disruptive, ask respectfully.
  • Learn Their Triggers. Understanding what causes stress or overstimulation can help reduce the need for distress-based stimming.
  • Provide Sensory Tools. Fidget toys, noise-canceling headphones, textured fabrics, or weighted blankets can all help support self-regulation.
  • Be an Advocate. If you’re a parent, friend, or coworker, help others understand stimming, too. Normalize it. Inclusion starts with education.

Support, don’t suppress. Embrace, don’t erase!

 

Litzy Vivas graduated from Texas State University in 2022 with her Bachelor of Science in Health Sciences. She is pursuing a Master of Science in Applied Behavior Analysis at Purdue University, working toward becoming a BCBA. Beginning her ABA journey in 2023 in San Antonio, she was later given the opportunity to support her community through BrightPath Behavior in 2024. She chose the field of ABA because she’s passionate about helping children reach their full potential. Litzy believes each child’s progress reflects the dedication and hard work of both the child and the family. She loves being a part of that support system and witnessing the life-changing impact of ABA therapy. A fun fact about her is that she has two cats, Frankie and Ivy.

 

 

 

visual schedule autism

Navigating Daily Routines with Autism

Individuals with autism often engage in some form of repetition during their day or exhibit rigidity in their routines (such as stimming, lining up toys, repeatedly turning lights on and off, etc.), so it makes sense that a routine would be beneficial. 

If you think about everyday living, we all have some daily routine: wake up, go to work or school, come home, eat dinner, and sleep. Like neurotypical individuals, autistic people thrive on routine, schedules, and consistency. We all rely on knowing what our day will look like to an extent, and we get a sense of comfort knowing that it won’t change much. 

visual schedule for kids with autism

Finding a routine that works for your child with autism

Here are some tips and tricks for creating a unique schedule for your child: 

  • Write out the specific activities that make up your family’s day (work, school, therapy)
  • Make a fun reminder for your child, such as a calendar or visual schedule, to aid in providing a visual reminder and help to identify each task (“on Mondays we go to school, therapy, grocery store (list store), then home”)

Even in the home, having a routine to help your child move through specific tasks and activities is helpful. Visual reminders can still be provided within the home to reference when it’s time to move on to the next task. 

You can create daily routines for your child with autism for any number of tasks, including:

  • Waking up
  • Mealtimes
  • Bathtime
  • Bedtime 

A morning routine example may look something like this: 

  • Wake up your child with a fun morning song
  • Remind your child it’s a school day and what activities are planned
  • Get dressed in clothes that were laid out the night before 
  • Sit at the kitchen table and eat breakfast
  • Brush teeth and hair
  • Put on shoes and get your backpack
  • Look over the daily calendar and discuss the various activities occurring during the day

Navigating changes in routines with autism

Change isn’t easy for anyone, and while none of us enjoy change, it may be harder to grasp when you rely on those set schedules and preplanned activities. Talk about any change happening in the day with your child; communication is vital. If you have advanced notice of schedule changes, such as a doctor’s appointment or family trip, plan the specific days with the new activities in place. “Not all changes are equal, and not all ASD patients react the same way.” (AppliedBehaviorAnalysisEdu), so ensure you’re prepared to assist your child in working through their emotions in an empathic and supportive manner.

ABA can be a helpful tool when setting a person with ASD up for success when changes occur. If significant changes to the routine are coming, discuss those with a BCBA and collaborate to find ways to help them navigate and accept those changes to ease any challenging behaviors that could arise.

Reaching out to a primary care physician about obtaining ABA services for a person with autism is another way to improve undesirable behaviors that may result from routine changes. As previously said, a common trait of autism is rigidity and repetitive behaviors; ABA therapy can use a play-based teaching method to teach and help children understand a routine and that routines change within a clinical setting. Examples of using ABA to teach tolerance to changes in routines include following a schedule to transition to different rooms within the clinic setting with different schedules occurring on different days. An example of this may look like:

  • Monday’s schedule: Sensory gym, breakfast, bathroom, group game, gross motor play
  • Tuesday’s schedule: Breakfast, group game, bathroom, gross motor play, sensory gym 

Within the clinic setting, there are many activities to engage in, with other children around who might play with items differently than what is preferred by your child. Exposure to other children and differences in their environment provides the ABA therapist opportunities to teach strategies to help with rigidity and to tolerate when someone is doing something differently than how they would play. For example, working with the child to allow a difference in play for short durations of time and increasing the duration of different play as they’re able to tolerate it or teaching the child that variations in play can be fun by making silly sounds or incorporating play the child enjoys (such as tickles or singing). 

A variety of strategies can be implemented during ABA therapy to aid in both teaching your child daily routines as well as how to tolerate changes to their routine.

What questions and comments do you have about your autistic child’s daily routine, and what has helped them deal with schedule changes?

We’d love to hear from you in the comments below. If you found this post helpful, please like, share, and follow us for more insightful content on autism and ABA therapy.

If a positive, play-based approach to ABA appeals to you, we invite you to reach out to BrightPath Behavior. The friendly team at BrightPath is always ready to help answer your questions.

 

References 

 

Applied Behavior Analysis Edu – https://www.appliedbehavioranalysisedu.org/why-is-routine-so-important-to-people-with-asd/

Autism Specialty Group – https://www.autismspecialtygroup.com/blog/importance-of-consistency-in-autism

Applied Behavior Analysis as Treatment for Autism Spectrum Disorder – https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Wayne-Fisher/publication/285517351_Applied_behavior_analysis/links/5ddc2e4c458515dc2f4db9e1/Applied-behavior-analysis.pdf

 

Tatum Kaiser always knew she wanted to work with kids. However, it wasn’t until her daughter began showing early signs of autism that she developed an interest in ABA. The experience of working closely with children with autism, coupled with the support and positivity from supervisors and coworkers, solidified her passion for the field. She finds joy in practicing play-based teaching and positive reinforcement strategies, which benefit her clients and kids. 

Currently pursuing a Bachelor’s degree in Applied Behavior Analysis at Capella University, Tatum balances her studies with motherhood. She uses her real-life experience to enhance her academic assignments and practical applications in the clinic. Her involvement with her daughter’s autism journey has provided her with unique insights that she shares with other parents, helping them navigate behavioral challenges with empathy and compassion.

alternatives to time-out

Alternatives to Time-Out

(Alternatives to Time-Out was originally posted December 3, 2014 by Dr. Lindsay Evans, additions made December 18, 2020 by Amanda Dixon)

Time-out can be an effective discipline technique for many children. However, some parents may want to approach challenging behavior without the use of a consequence that can evoke many strong, negative emotions. There are many other discipline strategies that you can use in combination with or as alternatives to time-out. These strategies are best for times when your child is misbehaving in a minor way (if a child is engaging in dangerous or aggressive behavior, immediate parent intervention and removal from the situation is best).

And, just a reminder, the most important tool of all is consistent and specific praise for appropriate behavior. Often times, challenging behavior can be reduced by providing attention and praise for behaviors you want to see immediately after they occur. If you do decide to incorporate time-out, be sure to check out this post to learn how to do an effective time-out with your child.

alternatives to time-out

Alternatives to Time-Out:

1) Try a “Do–Over”

Sometimes your child may behave impulsively in a moment of excitement or frustration, even when they know the rules. For such minor misbehavior, try letting your child know that their behavior was not acceptable, but they can try again. You might try saying something like, “You didn’t use nice words when you asked your Grandmother for another slice of pizza. Can you try that again saying please?” This serves two purposes: It gives your child a warning that their behavior was not acceptable and it also helps your child practice the appropriate behavior.

This strategy is best used for rare occasions. If you find yourself giving your child “do-overs” repeatedly, you might need to consider another method.

2) Re-Direct

This is often the simplest way to intervene when your child is misbehaving and it is a particularly helpful strategy for younger children who may have difficulty remembering rules and using self-control. This involves moving the child to a different area or removing a toy or object until the child’s behavior has improved. You can also substitute a new toy or activity to distract your child from the source of frustration, and say, “It looks like this toy is making your frustrated; let’s play with this instead.” Then, make sure to praise any behavior that is appropriate.

3) Make Amends

Often, children are forced to “say sorry” after a wrongdoing. An apology can be a very meaningful thing and help to repair disruptions in relationships. However, apologies become less effective if they are forced on a child as a consequence for misbehavior. When we do this, we run the risk of teaching our children that an apology is meaningless. Here is a great article, “A Better Way to Say Sorry,” about how to guide a child through an apology using a four-step format, 1) “I’m sorry because….”, 2) “This is wrong because…..”, 3) “Next time I will….” and 4) “Will you forgive me?”. Try role-playing these steps with your child and encourage them to apologize using this format.

4) Give Your Child Two Choices

If your child is misbehaving but not breaking a family rule (which would require immediate consequences), a warning with alternative choices is often enough to change the misbehavior. Approach your child and say, “You are not allowed to keep all of the toys to yourself. You have two choices: You can take turns with your brother, or you can go play in another room.”

5) Take a Break

This strategy is similar to a time-out except that you take the break with your child while they calm down and you use this time to have a discussion about how your child is feeling and his/her choices. If your child is losing control or getting upset, a cool down period can help them work through strong emotions and decide on the next step to take to right the wrong. This step might then be followed by a “do-over” or an apology. This strategy is not for children are misbehaving to get your attention.

Overall, evidence is clear that corporal punishment has limited effectiveness and has potentially dangerous side-effects. Time-out as well as many of the options listed above are positive strategies that can be integrated into your parenting approach based upon your personal parenting style and your child’s individual needs. Whichever parenting method you choose, it’s critical to provide enough quality, one-on-one time with your child to reduce the likelihood of misbehaving for your attention.

Behavioral Treatment for Specific Fears and Phobias

Fears and phobias are increasingly common in children, but behavioral treatment can help. A fear of needles is a particularly common fear that usually starts in early childhood and can result in significant avoidance of medical procedures in general.

What Research Says

A recent NPR story describes a research study published in 2012. The researchers surveyed over 800 parents and 1000 children. In the study, 24% of the parents and 63% of the children reported a fear of needles! This is concerning because specific fears and phobias can lead to avoidance of health-related procedures.

Cognitive Behavior Treatment

Luckily, there is behavioral treatment for specific fears and phobias. Behavior therapy or cognitive behavior therapy (CBT) can help children overcome their fears. The most effective behavioral treatment for specific fears and phobias is called graded exposure therapy. In graded exposure therapy the child is introduced to the feared situation or object in small steps until they are able to participate in the situation on their own.

For example, if a child has a fear of going to the dentist, the treatment can start out with the child reading a book about the dentist, looking at a picture of a dentist’s office, and observing a parent participate in a dental visit. Then the situations are gradually increased until the eventual goal of participating in a dental procedure is achieved. The same is true for getting haircuts or doctor’s offices. Kids with specific phobias and fears benefit from parent participation in the treatment process.

Practice at home will provide faster progress. Depending on the age and learning history with the feared object or situation, treatment can progress quickly or may take more time to break down the situation into smaller steps. Either way, behavior therapy or cognitive behavior therapy can help a child overcome their fears and phobias.